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Cyber-Sex With Amy Fisher
May 3, 2003 - 9:23 p.m.
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A couple of nights ago, I spent four hours making a new banner to run on DiaryLand.
It broke down like this: I spent about an hour looking for a photo to steal. I spent about two hours cropping the photo for the banner. And then I spent at least another hour trying to place the picture and the text on the banner.
The banner looks pretty good.
If I were in a first-grade class for slow students.
What is sadder than my artistic ability is the fact that, during my "research" for the banner, I discovered a web site devoted to- you guessed it- free Amy Fisher.
It gets worse. I also discovered that Amy Fisher writes an online column.
Amy wrote a column about cyber-dating. Through cyber-dating, Amy found her fiancÚ.
Amy discovered from her experience of dating online that there are, "Lots of nice people and of course, a few weirdos."
I'll let that irony stand on its own without comment.
I have participated in this phenomenon called cyber-dating. I've agreed to meet women online at a certain time of night, when normal people are going out, face-to-face. I have engaged in cyber-sex.
It's possible that I've had cyber-sex with Amy Fisher.
I had the feeling that my cyber-dating was pathetic. Now that I know that Amy Fisher and I share the same method of romantic socialization, I am wondering, what is the next level below pathetic?
No dicussion of Amy Fisher would be complete without this:
Say it with me.
I don't think it's fair to tease people about things beyond their control, like their looks or their surname. But this is an obvious exception.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have a date. And I don't even have to get out of my chair for it.